Grin and bear it

An unbearably good mood over the past 48 hours that nobody and nothing can seem to break. Almost anything and everything puts a shit-eating grin on my face, a demonic smirk that breaks almost any icy glaze. Completed 2 full days at work, it's shocking that I actually get work done now (earnings season, yippee!), despite the continued atmosphere that the team is on the path to self-destruction. Three of us shoot emails back and forth, a play by play of all the looks, whispers, phone calls, speculating and plotting chaos. Maybe it's that I've made a decision, or that I'm tired of being pensive, or that January 2006, one of the crappiest months in recent memory, is now officially behind us.

Or maybe that I've found an outlet...at 18:00, work ends and life begins. Come home, or not, eat, chat with the flatmates, then listen write read until midnight. Midnight in our line of work is an ungodly hour. Sleep has decreased 25%, with no apparent side effects. Yet.

Or perhaps everything has simply fallen into place. Goals are firmly in place, tentative exit date in mind, and in the background, concern for Wonderwoman's condition reminds me, us, what is important. And so when I have lunch with a colleague, a strange bitch session about the fate of the team, of the business, the indifference of upper management and the sad belief on the part of some that the indifference can be changed, mental monologue is part 'la la la' part 'oooh, this chicken is spicy' part 'this is really sad, not just what's happening here and now but because everywhere people worry inordinately about losing their jobs; and usually it's not worth the time lost on it'.